I think you should definitely search in the UDFs as I can't believe what you are looking for hasn't already been done.

In the mean time, I remember creating a UDF years ago that would do something like what you are needing. I have not used it in at least 5 years and when I wrote it, it was before I really felt comfortable with kix or com... but it might still be valuable: http://www.kixtart.org/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Main=12245&Number=75055#Post75055

Also... would mind posting your conversion of the vbs.