As a matter of fact, there seem to be the one or other braincell left
Your solution passed all tests
KiXtart
KiXtart Version = 4.53
KiXGolf Script = kixgolf_tg.kix
Computer
OS = Windows 2000 Professional
CPU = Intel(R) Pentium(R) 4 CPU 2.80GHz
Speed = 2793 MHz
Memory = 504 MB
KiXGolf Scoring Engine
Scoring Engine = 3.3
KiXtart Golf Score
Tournament = Taunt Generator
Processing Start = 2007/12/20 09:47:43.625
Processing End = 2007/12/20 09:47:43.671
Duration = 0000/00/00 00:00:00.046
KiXGolf Score = 816
Thank you for participating in KiXtart Golf!
function a($)
dim $b,$c,$d,$e,$g
for each $b in $
$c=2
$=theholygrail
for each $a in split($b)
dim $f
while $a
$f=$f|$a>'@'
$=substr($,1+(left($a,1)=left($,1)))
$a=right($a,~)
loop
$c=$c+$f
$b=join(split($b,' '))
Next
$g=$g+#Knight:\+$b+#
for $b=1 to $c/3
if $
$c=Hamster,Coconut,Duck,Herring,Newt,Peril,Chicken,Vole,Parrot,Mouse,Twit
$=conspicuous,categorical,positive,cruel,incontrovertib,steed,king,'first-born',mo,fa,grandmo,
grandfa,godfa,silly,wicked,sordid,naughty,repulsive,malodorous,'ill-tempered'
$d=$d+1
if $d mod 3=2
$=$c[$e mod 11]+!\Your\+$[$e/4 mod 3+5]+iif($e/4 mod 2,\masquerades\as\a\+$[$e/8 mod 5]+ly\,\is\a\)+$[$e/4 mod 7+13]
$e=$e+1
$b=$b+1
else
$=Your\+$[$e/2 mod 5+8]+ther\+iif($d mod 3,was,personified)+\a
endif
$=$+\+lcase($c[$e mod 11])
$e=$e+1
else
$='(A childish hand gesture)'
endif
$g=$g+Taunter:\+$+'.#'
$a=split(right(join(split($g,\)),~),#)
endfunction