As a matter of fact, there seem to be the one or other braincell left


Your solution passed all tests

KiXtart
KiXtart Version  = 4.53
KiXGolf Script   = kixgolf_tg.kix

Computer
OS               = Windows 2000 Professional
CPU              = Intel(R) Pentium(R) 4 CPU 2.80GHz
Speed            = 2793 MHz
Memory           = 504 MB

KiXGolf Scoring Engine
Scoring Engine   = 3.3

KiXtart Golf Score
Tournament       = Taunt Generator
Processing Start = 2007/12/20 09:47:43.625
Processing End   = 2007/12/20 09:47:43.671
Duration         = 0000/00/00 00:00:00.046
KiXGolf Score    = 816

Thank you for participating in KiXtart Golf!




function a($)
    dim $b,$c,$d,$e,$g
    for each $b in $
        $c=2
        $=theholygrail
        for each $a in split($b)
            dim $f
            while $a
                $f=$f|$a>'@'
                $=substr($,1+(left($a,1)=left($,1)))
                $a=right($a,~)
            loop
            $c=$c+$f
            $b=join(split($b,'  '))
        Next
        $g=$g+#Knight:\+$b+#
        for $b=1 to $c/3
            if $
                $c=Hamster,Coconut,Duck,Herring,Newt,Peril,Chicken,Vole,Parrot,Mouse,Twit
                $=conspicuous,categorical,positive,cruel,incontrovertib,steed,king,'first-born',mo,fa,grandmo,
                  grandfa,godfa,silly,wicked,sordid,naughty,repulsive,malodorous,'ill-tempered'
                $d=$d+1
                if $d mod 3=2
                    $=$c[$e mod 11]+!\Your\+$[$e/4 mod 3+5]+iif($e/4 mod 2,\masquerades\as\a\+$[$e/8 mod 5]+ly\,\is\a\)+$[$e/4 mod 7+13]
                    $e=$e+1
                    $b=$b+1
                else
                    $=Your\+$[$e/2 mod 5+8]+ther\+iif($d mod 3,was,personified)+\a
                endif
                $=$+\+lcase($c[$e mod 11])
                $e=$e+1
            else
                $='(A childish hand gesture)'
            endif
            $g=$g+Taunter:\+$+'.#'
            $a=split(right(join(split($g,\)),~),#)
endfunction



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