Function a($b)
Dim $z,$c,$t,$,$d,$v,$w
For Each $c in $b
For $t=-30 To 1
$c=Join(Split($c," "))
Next
$a=$a+"Knight: "+$c+#
For Each $v in Split($c)
$b=0
$z=1
For $w=1 To 72
$z=$z+(Substr($c,$w,1)=Substr(theholygrail,$z,1))
If Asc(Substr($v,$w))>64
$b=1
EndIf
Next
$t=$t+$b
Next
$b = Split("conspicuous categorical positive cruel incontrovertib steed king first-born mo fa grandmo grandfa godfa Hamster Coconut Duck Herring Newt Peril Chicken Vole Parrot Mouse Twit silly wicked sordid naughty repulsive malodorous ill-tempered")
For $v=1 to $t/3
If $v=1&$z>12
$z="(A childish hand gesture).#"
Else
$d=$d+1
If $d mod 3=2
$z=$b[$ mod 11+13]+"! Your "+$b[$/4 mod 3+5]+Iif($/4 mod 2," masquerades as a "+$b[$/8 mod 5]+"ly "," is a ")+$b[$/4 mod 7+24]
$=$+1
$v=$v+1
Else
$z="Your "+$b[$/2 mod 5+8]+"ther "+Iif($d mod 3,was,personified)+" a"
EndIf
$z=$z+" "+LCase($b[$ mod 11+13])+".#"
$=$+1
EndIf
$a=$a+"Taunter: "+$z
Next
$a=$a+#
Next
$a=Split(Left($a,~),#)
EndFunction